GNN
6.16.2005
 
Boy, Have We Got A Vacation For You...


You might recognize that line from a movie called “Westworld”. Released in 1973. Instant classic from the guy who brought you Jurassic Park, Mike Crichton. Forget the inventive plot, or the fine acting in one of Yul Brynner’s last movie roles, just to see that windbag James Brolin get shot and killed is worth the price of admission. But seriously, it’s an all-around must rent. Now THAT remake, I would watch. Most of these crappy retreads at the movies aren’t worth it, but I’d gladly drop $12 to see a remake of “Westworld.”

I’ve had a tall order these last several weeks… but look on the bright side, doesn’t the Jungle sound so much better without my input? I’d say so… One day I’ll get back into it… I’ll say this much - it is so good to not worry about having another responsibility of uploading the Takebox and so forth. Sure, at the time, I didn’t mind. But then the foundation started to break - and I had to do what I thought was right for the clones, more so myself. I had to jump before I was engulfed in flounder-laden lava. Given its reputation and controversy the last few days under my watch, I knew I didn’t want to endorse it any further. Sure, on the surface, I bore no ill will toward Jackie, but clearly, there was turbulence. The fact that she didn’t want to build up a new crew of moderators, to me, was one of the last straws, if not the last. This after running her best friend from the crew, if you remember. She once said, “I don’t know who I can trust” at this climate. Have you read “Mein Kampf”? Maybe even saw “The Godfather” one or 40 times? Not once did she admit that she went a bit too far. When she announced the disposal of the crews - without warning, I might add - I was perplexed. And her big thing was that the WCACC was the troublemaking crew. Okay, so all the crews should suffer? Perfect sense. Let me know when Sequential Math I class starts, Professor… Back to the straws: At first, it didn’t really hit me how malicious it was, the fact that she contacted the business of one of her former members. Nobody goes that far. Not even stalkers. Travis Bickle even thinks that’s a bad game plan. It’s one thing when you don’t wish to condone the behavior of your higher-ups… Another when you flat-out disagree with it. I tell you, I couldn’t be more ecstatic to have made that decision one month ago… Yes, I could have left anytime, but when I did, it was the right time… And the fact that its stock was falling was not just a coincidence, but the reason. It was time for me to move on.

To be honest, Jackie never did anything to hurt me. But she went out of her way to hurt, screw, swindle and defecate on countless others, probably yourself, and for that, I will never forgive her.

Anyway, I’ve received the emails that a few of you sent, requesting my patronage into the Stucknut realm. I am here to say that day will come. I’m not saying that it will not. See, before, when I put down the site, I was basically being a Mom puppet. Sure, the year prior to, I’ve been a Mom puppet, but once I realized who I was working with, I had to take that machete and cut all ties. Trust me, I’ll eventually arrive to join in on the fun, and take a few well-deserved beatdowns… I realize there’s still a few of you that hold a grudge against me, and rightly so. You’ve every reason to be mad at me. But know that there were times where I would have liked to think for myself, but I knew it would upset the selfish admin. And when I eventually rejoin all of you, I will apologize to one and all personally, especially Todd in Phoenix. While most of the harangue that went on at the Mom was Jackie’s fault, I take full responsibility for the mishandling of the Todd in Phoenix situation. First of all, how that “picture” got him a ban, when others may have posted worst in the past, is beyond me. Anyway, thinking back at some of the shit that broke out, and just sitting there and being her little “yes man”, I feel bad that I neglected the nucleus of the fansite, and that was you, formerly of the Mom, now of the Nut.

Now you’re probably wondering - why not join Stucknut now? Well, technically, I’m still in the middle of my sabbatical, a balance of education, meditation, and relaxation. Oh, and taking in a lion’s share of sports. For instance, I past by the Royals/Dodgers game tonight, with Lima Time on the mound, and noticed half his lettuce was bleached. Either that, or he’s got a bad Valtrex reaction, one or the other… I’ve also met a lot of people on my Sanity Journey… I played a round of “golden horseshoes” with Richard Branson in London; saw Dave Chappelle belting out some material in Johannesburg; and just a few days ago, I helped soccer star Freddy Adu drown his sorrows knocking back Beam shots - this coming after the news that Michael Jackson was acquitted on all counts in that child molestation case… Before I’m done, I’ll probably have done everything, except going relic hunting with Jeff in Phoenix. And at the end of the day, the one accomplishment I can say I’d be the most proud of is… not having to go relic hunting with Jeff in Phoenix…

And another thing - it’s not about power. If I wanted that, I would have stayed at the flotsam and jetsam that is what remains of the Mom. And you know, I’m kinda likin’ this “not required to upload new takes” gig. Which brings me to the weekly music and comedy extravaganza you’ve come to enjoy that was originally known as the “Momcast”. I’ve even got a few people saying they miss those shows, and even requested that I resume doing those shows (under a different name, obviously) upon my return. Let me begin by saying that I don’t mind doing it for you. It doesn’t matter what website it’s emanating from, it’s basically the same audience I’ll be entertaining. But kinda like I was telling Dave Chappelle a few weeks ago, when you’re away from what you do best a long time, sometimes it’s hard to regain that passion. Clearly, I’ve got it easy: I only have to make a few dozens happy, while Dave’s expectancy is in the upper millions of people… He writes jokes - whose originality is more hard to come by these days than a good commercial jingle, or a virgin named Hilton; I slap together a few songs and radio show clips, sprinkle in some movie quotes, and make sure the segues are tight. Now I realize my task at hand isn’t worth $50 million dollars, but it’s priceless, nonetheless. So will I host a revamped weekly program on Friday nights - it’s possible. But just like in Chappelle’s case, you’ve got to give me a little more time to regroup on that… Trust me, I enjoyed making the clones happy, but ever since I stumbled across having zero responsibilities and a newfound freedom, I am enjoying it to the fullest. We’ll see. In the meantime: I hereby pass the torch to anyone who wishes to take on that responsibility. Whoever wants to fill that void, you have my blessing. I should clarify that this only applies to the Stucknut website. Someone told me that Jackie had posted a message asking anyone who wanted to continue the Momcast on her site. Miss me, huh, J? Me and everybody else, it seems, from what I’m told.

Which leads into this. This is amazing… So amazing, you’ll have no problem that Jacko is not a convicted pedophile, or James Brolin may never live out his final scene in “Westworld” in real life. (Or Streisand, for that matter.) So, I heard from Gordo the other day. Well, first I received an email with the subject “Ethan Homecoming”. Good to see him home. Immediately, I emailed Gordo to ask him for more information. In addition to describing the ride home, he added that he called Jackie to tell her he was coming him, to which she replied, “You guys are a bunch of fucking assholes”. Click. Un-freaking-believable. That wench. I really thought she cared about the kid. Even when she ran Gordo off, she said “Ethan is still a clone”. And Gordo would never lie to me. Ever. Once again, I couldn’t be more ecstatic to have made that decision one month ago. She really showed her true colors with that comment. I was taken aback when I read it. This is why I ejected when I did. Because I knew this situation was only going to get worse. And I did not want to be associated with it. Like I told Larry King last month, this is her mess now. I say, do not give credit to Jackie for first bringing Ethan to our attention, but give yourselves that credit for embracing him and giving him the karma that he truly needed. Each and every one on you.

As far as the show is concerned, I’m still listening, even as my job has presented me with meetings and projects that taken away some listening time. I understand that the show will be emerging into “Podcasting” pretty soon. Good thing, but… You heard this from me first: Don’t expect to hear the “Lust for Life” or “Welcome to the Jungle” intros, or any of the other intros to the segments, or any of the outros of segments where Rome talks over music. Why? Well, Rush Limbaugh - another Premiere Radio program which engages in Podcasting - has the music beds spliced out of his show’s MP3’s. But it wasn’t at his request; it had to do with a sanction from the RIAA, which prohibits distribution of any music via MP3. Even if the radio personality talks over it. Meaning the audio quality of the MP3’s might be a bit choppy. Other Premiere programs that Podcast suffer from the same setback. Luckily, Rome only talks over music at the end of segments, so you won’t be missing much. But think of what you might be missing out on the Podcast: The post Huge-Call show close… Three Day Weekend’s J-Stew song… Terence’s J-Stew song… Ashlee Simpson’s Orange Bowl “performance”… Hey, is Carl Lewis affected by this, as well? Okay, so it’s not all that bad… And by the way, the streams via Streamlink as you hear them now will remain intact. So it is going to be okay, after all. But don’t say I didn’t warn you if some elements are missing from the Podcasts… So, did anyone else find it interesting that around the time I was putting this blog entry together, Rome was interviewing a blogger? This medium has caught fire. Thank you, Al Gore.

I should say that while I have been away from the Jungle for awhile, I haven’t been off the radio completely… One day, I lobbed a call to Bob Grant in what can very well be one of the worst segments (by Bob Grant segments) on the show. Before you download the call, you should peruse the following stories so that you can get the references within the call:

Story 1
Story 2
Story 3

And now… The rest of the story…

Download

And as long as you’re downloading that, you may want to grab this - I got this from Rome’s double-secret webcam feed, during commercial breaks, Rome will preview some emails before air and read them aloud - they don’t make the air, but they make the webcam feed…

Download

So I just thought I’d give you an update, not through some processed phenomena, but from my own word. I felt I had to share my feelings with you, and soon I shall share much more with you. Till then, stay strong, fight the wrong, time has caught up with Shelley Long, hit that bong, play mah-jongg, and enjoy your Podcasts minus songs…

Oh yeah… There isn’t really a webcam feed for the show - but then you already knew that…

Dorito.

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